I got my student loan repayment schedule in the mail today, which was a nice invitation to the real world - and reminder that I am a college dropout and waste of life. But I’m not too worried about it because I’m probably going to be wildly successful and even if I’m not, I’m sure someone will pay me to suck their dick once in a while.
You guys know me by now, I hope. You know that I do not mind at all to share gross details of my life and body, or maybe you don’t know that but I think you should. I just wanted to warn you because I’m about to share a detail of life that no one ever talks about! Because I love those gross life details that no one talks about and I wish people would talk about them!
Anyway, if you are a woman, and you go swimming, sometimes, NOT ALWAYS, but sometimes water gets stuck up in your v-hole and later, when you’re at home post-pool chillin’ and maybe eating some watermelon, water will leak out of your v-hole. It’s so weird! Why can’t it just be absorbed into your body? That would make so much more sense and be a lot more comfortable for everyone. I hope that this is actually a thing that happens to everyone and not just something I experience because now I’m worried that I’m secretly 9 months pregnant and about to go into labor. Just kidding! It’s not that much water! Besides, dramatic water breaking is not even really that much of a thing! My sister gave birth to a human last year and her water didn’t break until she was crying in a hospital bed and thought she just peed herself a little. I may have just made that up, but I think it probably actually happened.
i want to be happy and funny and successful and creative and making some kind of thing that a lot of people like and i want to be loved and in love and i want to have a pool in my backyard, that’s about all i know at this point.